Our youths: Books for vegetarian & vegan children

Folks, I’m always looking for books geared towards vegetarian and vegan children. There are lots of great ones on the market. I have yet to find any specifically for our children though. Have you? Do tell. http://www.hiddenhistorypublishers.com Check out the gardening workbooks there. http://www.vrg.org/family/Vegetarian-friendly_Kids_Booklist.pdf http://www.goodreads.com/list/show/3838.Vegetarian_Vegan_Friendly_Books_for_Kids http://www.amazon.com/The-Childrens-Health-Food-Book/dp/0964708906 http://www.rasekhistore.com/books.html  (I Get Energy From the Sun) http://www.wedonteatanimals.com P.S.- Here’s a book about healthy eating for our youths: http://www.amazon.com/Nilajahs-Sweet-Treats-Angela-Freeman/dp/1495492117

*These are great for parents. http://www.peta.org/issues/animals-used-for-food/animals-used-food-factsheets/vegan-children-healthy-happy/

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Wilhelmina Model Paid to Destroy Bill Cosby Comes Forward. (FYM Exposes the Truth!)

 Honestly this sounds more like it. If it’s true it’s just a reminder that the more things change the more they remain the same. That’s all.

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On November 15, 2014, FYM, received an email from a Free Housing Project member. (All Free Housing Members are verified through a background check prior to membership.  This female member has been a member for 2 years and has worked on several missions.) She explained in her email that she trusts FYM’s to post the truth about Bill Cosby. She would like to remain anonymous. (FYM fact checks all information prior to release.) FYM has verified the identity of the model who worked with Choice and Wilhelmina Models in 1982. She also provided (FYM) with the booking agents information; names of each casting agent and location. She was given Bill Cosby’s location during that time and we confirmed the location. (Important note: Choice & Wilhelmina had no prior knowledge of this situation. Bad people book models all the time.)

(Before we start down this road. This is what happened in 2004. ‘A woman claimed she was assaulted in 2004 by Bill Cosby. The prosecutor said she didn’t report it for over a year. No evidence. She never said she was raped. The rest happened over 30 years ago. The following information has been fact check and verified and provides evidence that Mr. Bill Cosby is being setup. The casting agent that contact Choice provided the model with two addresses: one to the casting appointment at the Ritz Carlton and a second address to Cosby’s location.)

I wasn’t going to send this email to FYM, but, the feeding frenzy on Bill Cosby’s character made my response necessary. In 1982, I had a  photographer named Choice. Choice was contacted by a casting agent, I was told to meet the client at the Ritz Carlton for lunch in New York in the summer of 82’. This client wanted to talk to me about a film project. I arrived at the Ritz Carlton at 11:30 AM. Two male clients arrived; a Caucasian male (late 30s) and an Asian male (early 50s). They indicated that I’d be perfect for a film project.

I was told the project paid $5000 cash. I thought that was strange, who pays $5000 cash for a modeling job? The job was to meet Bill Cosby and to try to seduce him; it would be apart of the script. I was confused by this job request? They told me I would be recording the session to see if I was successful and believable? My response to them… I would like to meet Mr. Cosby first and discuss the script. They said no, it wasn’t necessary to meet him. They said it was a spontaneous casting call? I have never in my life heard of a spontaneous casting call.

As a legitimate model this seemed strange and unethical. I immediately turned down the job. The Asian man continued speaking and offered me $10,000 cash upfront and $5000 upon delivery of some seductive photos and some of his sperm. Sperm?

(I was in shock when they said sperm?) I then realized that these two men had unethical intentions. I excused myself, went to the bathroom, and then I left the hotel and went home.  Now, as a model in New York, I’ve been offered drugs, trips around the world, films, videos, money from rich men, casting couch and the list is endless.

As a naive model you’re offered many compromising projects,but, this blew my mind. I was offered $15,000 to seduce and destroy Bill Cosby. Why else would they need suggestive photos and sperm? I also realized that America has a history of oppressing, killing and destroying successful and poor people of color.

I wasn’t going to send this letter to FYM, but, the media lynching of one of our global icons (Bill Cosby), is simply unacceptable. Also, after watching Nightline, Associated Press, CNN, CBS, NPR, Fox, and many other news outlets blatantly misconstrue and lied about old dismissed allegations of Bill Cosby. I’m shocked by the lack of integrity of our major news media. Why would CNN, ABC, CBS, AP and the like lie about 30 year old untrue news?

Nightline simply cut, deleted and distorted the Cosby interview– making him appear guilty. What has happened to the integrity of our nation?

I was offered $15,000 cash to discredit and ruin Bill Cosby. I’m 100% convinced that all the women coming forward have been paid off to discredit Bill Cosby as well. Why? He is simply too powerful, his intentions is to empower people of color and his net worth would anger any white man.

I think most people are good people.  My intentions aren’t to insult white people, but, the facts are the facts.

It’s a fact that–9/10th of the global population are people of color and only 1/10th of the global population are whites. As in Ferguson, 14,000 people of color are controlled and abused by 60 white city officials. Reminds me of a plantation. The world doesn’t want powerful people like Bill Cosby to empower people of color and teach them that we have always had the power in numbers and economically.

Lest we forget, over the last 500 years our government has hunted, oppressed, enslaved and murdered: millions of Indians, millions of black slaves, millions of people of color globally, Black Wall Street, Medgar Evers, Malcom X, Martin Luther King, the Black Panthers, Mike Brown, etc.

In America, in 2014, white police officer(s) murders black unarmed men at a rate of every 28 hours. Sadly,  America has a long history of killing and oppressing powerful people of color. This is why I came forward.  I hope this open letter reaches the media and our beloved Bill Cosby and his loving family.

I simply trust http://freeyourmindandthink.com because they are a open source sharing community. FYM educates people on creating a world that provides: free housing, free organic healthy food sources, free educational resources, free health care for all and heals the earth. FYM has nothing to gain by posting this ‘open letter’ and I simply don’t trust the news media.

Please don’t get angry at my photographer, the modeling agency and or FYM.  I simply came forward because no one should lose their good name because of an allegation or lie.  It’s like burning a witch to death because her neighbor said she was a witch. I hope we are better than ancient practices. I have to say, I’m very disappointed in how the media frames the news.”

This letter was not edited or censored by FYM. (All authors who post on our site have access to update their post.) FYM is located in America which is the land of the free. Please keep in mind all human beings are innocent until proven guilty in a court of law by ones peers.

Read the comments at http://freeyourmindandthink.com/wilhelmina-model-paid-to-destroy-bill-cosby-comes-forward-fym-exposes-the-truth/

Sanctuary: Making your home a haven

Home, which once served as our refuge, is no longer a sanctuary for most of us.  We return home to a deluge of mail, bills, telephone messages and chores.  Cell phones and email connect us constantly with the outside world, at the same time interrupting our contact with our families.   In some homes, the TV is on constantly, blaring news of upsetting events and life and death dramas.

To flourish, we all need a safe place — both physically and emotionally — to come home to.  If children are to turn their full attention to the many demands of growing up, they need a secure, solid home where they feel protected.  They need to feel we can keep them safe:  from the neighborhood bully, from kidnappers, from terrorists.

And no matter how independent they are as they pursue their interests outside the home, kids need to know they can count on the presence of their parents when they get home.  Your children would rather be with you than do anything else in the world for a very long time.  Even after they start having sleepovers and marathon baseball games, when they come home they want two things: a safe place where they can be fully themselves, and to connect with the rest of the family in a deep, comfortable, and fun way. If your kid seems to live only for screen time, she’s signaling a deeper hunger that needs  filling.

Giving your children a sanctuary is an enormous gift.  It allows them to go out and do battle in the world, and return home to recharge.  It also gives your family culture the cozy nest it needs to thrive.  Finally, research shows that adults who consciously create homes where they find nurturance and beauty report better moods and less stressful lives.

So what can you do, in this busy world, to create a sanctuary for your family?

1. Slow down.  We all love excitement, but stress kills.  Literally.  Stress erodes our patience, our ability to give our best to our kids, and our health.  Stress makes us fat, frantic and more likely to become furious.  If we’re honest with ourselves, we can usually see how we make our lives more stressful than they need to be, simply by being unwilling to make the choice to slow down. If you want your kids to behave better, start by slowing down and not rushing so much.

2. Your children’s home is their sanctuary.  That means all household members treat each other respectfully, and no violence, physical or verbal, is tolerated, including between children. Click here for ideas on how to stop your kids from fighting with each other.

3. Try not to over-structure time at home.  Home needs to be low-pressure time, not performance time.  Of course, all children need to be contributing members of the household.  But they also need plenty of time to chill out.  Try not to swamp them with too many obligations on top of homework, basic chores, music practice, religious studies, etc. Teenagers, especially, are usually under tremendous stress.

4. Accept your children’s “Baby Self.”  You know the Baby Self.  It’s that part of your child that emerges in the form of regression when your child has been coping with lots of “grown-up” demands.  All day they work hard to hold it together at preschool. When you show up, you evoke the baby self simply by being their parent.  They fall apart.  They whine, or at least act a bit childish.

Should you reprimand them, demand appropriate behavior?   Usually it works better if you don’t.   All kids need a chance to be their baby self, and the younger they are, the more time the baby self needs to be “out”.  If you let your child be “little” when they need to be (cozy times, bedtime, when they are tired) you reduce the chance they’ll disintegrate at inappropriate times (dinner with Grandma, in line at the supermarket.)

My advice is to allow young children to indulge their “Baby Selves” at home when possible. You can expect tantrums or tears or whining after a long day at preschool, or after that first sleepover, or after the school play she worked so hard on, or simply on Friday afternoon after a pressured week.  All children have to work hard to perform a high percentage of the time, from sitting still at school to negotiating with friends to picking off that runner at first base.  They all need a chance to let the “Baby Self” emerge without being ridiculed.

And while it sometimes seems as if they’ll be babies forever, their Baby Selves will disappear sooner than you can imagine, along with your car keys.

5. Provide enough structure so that children’s routines run predictably.  Kids need to know what to expect.   Imagine yourself sitting working on a project when your spouse unexpectedly tells you it’s time for a visit to the inlaws.  Children often feel like they have little control over their lives; exacerbating that by springing schedule changes on them invariably creates resistance.  Structure also keeps things more organized, eliminating the stress of constant last-minute searches for things. Click here for more oncreating family routines and structure.

6. Limit Technology.  Set a good example by turning off your computer and cell phone to spend the evening with your family. Make it a family rule that Saturdays are technology-free.  Worried about how you’ll cope?  That’s a sure sign that your household needs to schedule in a regular tech-free day. Try it as an experiment.  You might all feel awkward as you start bumping up against each other — “Hey, you live here?” — but the connectedness will blow you away, and you won’t go back. 

7. Be aware of the impact of sound.  One oncologist I know has peaceful music, or waterfalls, in every room of his house.  He cites numerous studies proving that peaceful sounds offers nourishment to the immune system as well as the soul.

The other end of this continuum, of course, is loud TV, upsetting news, and blaring traffic.  For more info on TV and news, please see Protective Parenting,Your Preschooler or Toddler & TV, and Why TV Undermines Academics.  Regarding traffic, you might find it interesting  that seeing eye dogs who live in cities have shorter lives because of the noise stress.  Anything you can do to minimize traffic sounds will protect your family physically and emotionally.

8.  Create a supportive family culture. Click here for Eight ways every parent can create a Family Identity and Culture that holds their family together through thick and thin.

Written by Dr. Laura Markham

9 Ways to Foster Kids’ Spirituality by Dr.Laura Markham

Photo: Jainniec

If you have a deep faith and keep the rituals and calendar of your religious tradition, then you’ve probably given a lot of thought to your child’s spiritual development and have it all mapped out.  If, on the other hand, you wonder how to put what you believe into words and aren’t sure what tradition you want to pass on to your kids, this article is for you.

All humans have a spiritual dimension.  You don’t have to believe in a supreme being to teach your child the great spiritual lessons. Whatever your beliefs, you probably want  your children to know that life is sacred, that nature deserves a certain reverence, that their presence in the world contributes to joy and goodness, that things have a way of working out (not always as we expect), that the greatest joy usually comes from sharing with others, and that while we don’t always get what we want, we can always choose to make the most of what we get.

Some ideas for nondenominational (and even God-optional, if that’s your preference) spirituality:

1. Nurture your child’s natural sense of wonder and magic, which is the beginning of spirituality. People who feel connected to nature are healthier physically and emotionally.  A spiderweb glistening with dew, the rising moon, a waterfall, kittens being born, even a simple green shoot breaking through the earth reminds us of the miracle that is life.  As Rachel Carson said, “Those who contemplate the beauty of the earth find reserves of strength that will endure as long as life lasts.”

2. Foster trust.  Even if your spirituality does not include a Supreme Being, children need to feel that the universe smiles on them. Einstein said that the most important decision each person makes is deciding whether or not this is a friendly universe.

People who feel safe in the world are more emotionally and physically healthy, as well as more willing to reach out to others.  Of course you need to teach your children how to keep themselves safe, but the knowledge that some people are not to be trusted should not keep them from trusting people in general.

One implication of this is that young children should not be exposed to TV news, which has been proven to make anyone who watches it feel less safe and more likely to over-estimate the chances of threatening occurrences.

Einstein was probably recommending a deeper level of trust as well, a sense that life has meaning and that the good we do in the world matters.

3. Have the deeper conversations. In our rush to move our children through the schedule, we often see their constant questions as a nuisance. But children ask the questions that matter.  “Why would someone shoot other people they don’t know?”  “Why do people leave trash in the park when everyone should clean up their own mess?”   “Why does the sun come up every morning?” Whether trying to make sense of the human heart or the mysteries of the universe, children are asking us to help them make sense of things. It’s fine to say you don’t know the answer to everything, to wonder together, to grieve, and to search together for answers.

But it’s important to communicate to your child that tragedy does not just fall out of the sky. Even if we can’t see the reason, there are reasons for the things that happen. And there is always something each one of us can do, in every moment, to make things better. “So you might explain an act of violence by saying something like this: “Sometimes people disagree with each other and they don’t use their words to work things out. They fight — with their hands, or guns, or bombs. Those things always create more pain and hurt. That’s why we always try to use words.”

4. Don’t assume religious educators are teaching your child what you think matters spiritually.  My daughter, for instance, was taught in religious school that the Abraham and Isaac bible story means that if God tells you to kill someone, you do it.  Whatever your religion, know what your child is being taught by religious educators.  Help him to interpret it in a healthy way.

5. Limit technology noise.  Many of us use background TV and radio as a way to avoid being alone with ourselves.  Children, even more than the rest of us, need quiet time to simply be present with themselves.  Music is a wonderful part of setting the mood in your house, but if radio voices that your child is not listening to are intruding on the peacefulness of your home, she has to work to block those voices out, which increases her tension level.  And if the voices are talking about issues that are disturbing to your child, the tension escalates.  (For more on how to create a peaceful home, see Sanctuary: Making Your Home a Haven.)

6. Take time for what really matters.  Try to build in enough time so that you can stop rushing your children past the wondrous moments of everyday life.  Marvel at the sun glittering on the snow.  Stop and smell the roses.  Bless the rainbow.  Don’t feel you have to turn it into a science lesson, reducing the sacred whole to mechanistic parts.

7. All humans benefit from time for reflection.  If your tradition includes prayer, teach your child to listen as well as to talk while praying.  And whether you regularly pray or not, all families need walks in the woods or looking up at the moon or even a car ride on a sun-warmed morning to sit quietly together, soaking in the wonder of life.

8. Teach your child gratitude.  Gratitude is a time-honored spiritual path that works regardless of your beliefs about the nature of the divine.  The deeper our gratitude, the greater our ability to receive, and the more we get out of life.

Of course, children rarely understand their many blessings, and guilt is not an effective teacher.   Modeling is the best strategy, simply noting aloud, frequently, how lucky we are to have this beautiful day, this bountiful meal, this reliable car, such a terrific teacher or neighbor, and, of course, each other.

Information is also useful, given judiciously and matter-of-factly in an age appropriate manner:  “Some kids don’t have a back yard to play in like we do, that’s why we cherish it and take good care of it.” “Grandma is getting older and won’t be with us forever, so we take advantage of every chance we can to visit her, even though it’s sometimes not so interesting for you. “

And of course, small habits like grace before meal, or counting our blessings, or a thank you at bedtime for the wonderful day, serve as place-markers for the deeper gratitude your children will develop as they mature.

“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.”
~ Melody Beattie

9. Help your child learn the joy of contribution.  Children (and many older folks) generally find it puzzling that the world is so unjust.  Whatever your religious beliefs, you probably want your kids to know that the angels — literally or figuratively — need our help.  The pride of contributing to the betterment of society makes us happier, and it will make our children happier too. Our job as parents is to find ways for our kids to make a positive difference in the world so they can enjoy and learn from this experience.

I looked at all the caged animals in the shelter…the cast-offs of human society.
I saw in their eyes love and hope, fear and dread, sadness and betrayal. And I was angry.
“God,” I said, “this is terrible! Why don’t you do something?”
God was silent for a moment and then He spoke softly.
“I have done something,” He replied. “I created You.”
— Jim Willis

NOTE: This is a book that may help too. I haven’t read it yet.http://www.amazon.com/Nurturing-Spirituality-Children-Hands-On-Activities/dp/158270211X

“Parenting Beyond Belief” is another amazing book. It’s written for agnostics and atheists and I found it extremely helpful.  www.parentingbeyondbelief.com. You may dig the youtube channel by the same name. Great stuff!

10 Reasons not to hit your kids

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Ten Reasons Not to Hit Your Kids
by Jan Hunt

In 37 countries1 around the world, it is illegal for a parent, teacher, or anyone else to spank a child, and 113 countries prohibit corporal punishment in schools. Yet in all of North America, physical punishment by a parent, as long as it is not severe, is still seen by many as necessary discipline, and condoned, or sadly, even encouraged.For the past several years, many psychiatrists, sociological researchers, and parents have recommended that we seriously consider banning the physical punishment of children. The most important reason, according to Dr. Peter Newell, coordinator of the organization End Punishment of Children (EPOCH)2, is that “all people have the right to protection of their physical integrity, and children are people too.”3

1. Hitting children teaches them to become hitters themselves. Extensive research data is now available to support a direct correlation between corporal punishment in childhood and aggressive or violent behavior in the teenage and adult years. Virtually all of the most dangerous criminals were regularly threatened and punished in childhood. It is nature’s plan that children learn attitudes and behaviors through observation and imitation of their parents’ actions, for good or ill. Thus it is the responsibility of parents to set an example of empathy and wisdom.

2. In many cases of so-called “bad behavior”, the child is simply responding in the only way he can, given his age and experience, to neglect of basic needs. Among these needs are: proper sleep and nutrition, treatment of hidden allergy, fresh air, exercise, and sufficient freedom to explore the world around him. But his greatest need is for his parents’ undivided attention. In these busy times, few children receive sufficient time and attention from their parents, who are often too distracted by their own problems and worries to treat their children with patience and empathy. It is surely wrong and unfair to punish a child for responding in a natural way to having important needs neglected. For this reason, punishment is not only ineffective in the long run, it is also clearly unjust.

3. Punishment distracts the child from learning how to resolve conflict in an effective and humane way. As the educator John Holt wrote, “When we make a child afraid, we stop learning dead in its tracks.”  A punished child becomes preoccupied with feelings of anger and fantasies of revenge, and is thus deprived of the opportunity to learn more effective methods of solving the problem at hand. Thus, a punished child learns little about how to handle or prevent similar situations in the future.

4. Punishment interferes with the bond between parent and child, as it is not human nature to feel loving toward someone who hurts us. The true spirit of cooperation which every parent desires can arise only through a strong bond based on mutual feelings of love and respect. Punishment, even when it appears to work, can produce only superficially good behavior based on fear, which can only take place until the child is old enough to resist. In contrast, cooperation based on respect will last permanently, bringing many years of mutual happiness as the child and parent grow older.

5. Many parents never learned in their own childhood that there are positive ways of relating to children. When punishment does not accomplish the desired goals, and if the parent is unaware of alternative methods, punishment can escalate to more frequent and dangerous actions against the child.

6. Anger and frustration which cannot be safely expressed by a child become stored inside; angry teenagers do not fall from the sky. Anger that has been accumulating for many years can come as a shock to parents whose child now feels strong enough to express this rage. Punishment may appear to produce “good behavior” in the early years, but always at a high price, paid by parents and by society as a whole, as the child enters adolescence and early adulthood.

7. Spanking on the buttocks, an erogenous zone in childhood, can create in the child’s mind an association between pain and sexual pleasure, and lead to difficulties in adulthood. “Spanking wanted” ads in alternative newspapers attest to the sad consequences of this confusion of pain and pleasure. If a child receives little parental attention except when being punished, this will further merge the concepts of pain and pleasure in the child’s mind. A child in this situation will have little self-esteem, believing he deserves nothing better. For more on this topic, see “The Sexual Dangers of Spanking Children” (also in French).

8. Even relatively moderate spanking can be physically dangerous. Blows to the lower end of the spinal column send shock waves along the length of the spine, and may injure the child. The prevalence of lower back pain among adults in our society may well have its origins in childhood punishment. Some children have become paralyzed through nerve damage from spanking, and some have died after mild paddlings, due to undiagnosed medical complications.

9. Physical punishment gives the dangerous and unfair message that “might makes right”, that it is permissible to hurt someone else, provided they are smaller and less powerful than you are. The child then concludes that it is permissible to mistreat younger or smaller children. When he becomes an adult, he can feel little compassion for those less fortunate than he is, and fears those who are more powerful. This will hinder the establishment of meaningful relationships so essential to an emotionally fulfilling life.

10. Because children learn through parental modeling, physical punishment gives the message that hitting is an appropriate way to express feelings and to solve problems. If a child does not observe a parent solving problems in a creative and humane way, it can be difficult for him to learn to do this himself. For this reason, unskilled parenting often continues into the next generation.

Gentle instruction, supported by a strong foundation of love and respect, is the only truly effective way to bring about commendable behavior based on strong inner values, instead of superficially “good” behavior based only on fear.


1
Sweden, Finland, Norway, Austria, Cyprus, Denmark, Latvia, Croatia, Bulgaria, Israel, Germany, Turkmenistan, Iceland, Ukraine, Romania, Hungary, Greece, Netherlands, New Zealand, Portugal, Uruguay, Venezuela, Spain, Togo, Costa Rica, Republic of Moldova, Luxembourg, Liechtenstein, Poland, Tunisia, Kenya, Republic of Congo, Albania, South Sudan, Macedonia, Honduras, and Malta. (Source: Global Initiative to End Corporal Punishment of Children)
2 EPOCH Worldwide, 77 Holloway Road, London N78JZ UK
3 Personal communication.An earlier version of this article appeared as Appendix D in Alice Miller’s book Breaking Down the Wall of Silence (New York: Penguin USA, new edition 1997).

References:

French translation

Italian translation

Portuguese translation

Jan Hunt, M.Sc., offers phone counseling worldwide, with a focus on parenting, unschooling, and personal matters. She is the Director of The Natural Child Project and author of The Natural Child: Parenting from the Heart and A Gift for Baby.

More articles by Jan Hunt