Magazines for our girls

Hi folks.  Hope all is well in your world. Familiar with these?
Just found them for a friend’s 13 year old daughter:
I was already familiar with:
Now they have a teen version. Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I haven’t seen any of these with my own eyes. Just been to the websites and Fb pgs. Spread the word!!!

More children’s books we enjoyed this year

There are so many that stood out for us.

https://www.scholastic.com/teachers/books/stars-of-the-sea-by-allan-fowler/

https://www.amazon.com/Wild-Cats-Step-into-Reading/dp/0375825517

https://www.amazon.com/Could-Still-Rookie-Read-About-Science/dp/0516200283

https://www.amazon.com/Far-Away-Munsch-Kids/dp/155037396X

https://www.amazon.ca/Happy-Book-English-Kathy-Knowles/dp/0228702593

https://www.amazon.com.br/Who-Told-Most-Incredible-Story/dp/9964705360

https://www.amazon.com/Ebeles-Favourite-Book-African-Games/dp/1845071867

https://www.amazon.com/My-Grandfather-Magician-African-Village/dp/1845075102

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1845076869/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_bibl_vppi_i16

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0711212554/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_bibl_vppi_i18

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1845071131/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_bibl_vppi_i20

https://www.amazon.com/Best-Mum-Sarah-Nash/dp/1870516621

https://www.amazon.com/Wild-Cats-Step-into-Reading/dp/0375825517

https://www.amazon.com/I-am-Vegetarian-Olayinka-Ladeji/dp/150256212X

https://www.amazon.com/Thats-Why-Dont-Eat-Animals/dp/1556437854

https://www.amazon.com/Disney-Moana-Little-Play-Sound/dp/1503711064

https://www.amazon.com/Get-Energy-Sun-Kajara-Nebthet/dp/1494740958

https://www.amazon.com/Village-Round-Square-Houses/dp/0316328626

A bunch of titles from this series: https://www.berenstainbears.com/

https://www.amazon.com/Nighttime-Noises-Samantha-Berger/dp/0717266265

https://www.amazon.com/K-Kwanzaa-Juwanda-Ford/dp/0439560713

https://www.amazon.com/Jump-Sun-Beginning-Kwanzaa-Classics/dp/0786809248

https://www.amazon.com/Our-Grandparents-Global-Album-Children/dp/1570914591

https://www.amazon.com/Faith-Global-Fund-Children-Books/dp/1580891780

https://www.amazon.com/Be-Artist-Maya-Ajmera-2004-02-01/dp/B01FJ1MIOU

https://www.amazon.com/Wiggles-Squiggles-Miss-Spider-David/dp/0448440024

https://www.amazon.com/India-World-Alphabets-Prodeepta-Das/dp/1847807577

https://www.amazon.com/Guess-How-Much-Love-You/dp/0763642649

https://www.amazon.com/Heart-Tigers-Keith-Lawrence-Roman/dp/0982728808

https://www.amazon.com/Love-Hair-Natasha-Anastasia-Tarpley/dp/0316525588

https://www.amazon.com/Colors-Us-Karen-Katz/dp/0805071636

https://www.amazon.com/Shades-Black-Celebration-Our-Children/dp/0439802512

https://www.amazon.com/Read-Rise-Sandra-Pinkney/dp/B002CMLRII

https://www.amazon.com/Rainbow-All-Around-Me/dp/043930928X

https://www.amazon.com/When-Were-Together-Claire-Freedman/dp/1561486582

https://www.amazon.com/Village-Storyteller-Hop-Step-Jump/dp/0333976320

https://www.amazon.com/Angry-Mountain-Level-Step-step/dp/0333741447

https://www.amazon.com/Gyps-Puppies-Hop-Step-Jump/dp/140502514X

https://www.amazon.com/Taming-Pudding-Pan-Level-Jump-step/dp/0333741412

https://www.amazon.com/School-That-Sank-Step-Jump/dp/0333976584

https://www.amazon.com/Ellington-Was-Street-Ntozake-Shange/dp/0689828845

https://www.amazon.com/Sweet-Smell-Roses-Angela-Johnson/dp/1416953612

https://www.amazon.com/Weed-Flower-George-Washington-Carver/dp/0671664905

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Emekas-Gift-African-Counting-Story/dp/0711212554

https://www.amazon.com/Thumbelina-Fred-H-Crump/dp/1555231918

https://www.amazon.com/Afrotina-Three-Bears-Fred-Crump/dp/1555231950

https://www.amazon.com/Ebony-Duckling-Fred-H-Crump/dp/1555234577

https://www.amazon.com/Jamako-Beanstalk-Fred-H-Crump/dp/1555232965

https://www.amazon.com/Rainfield-Who-Greatest-Isaac-Olaleye/dp/0590483633

https://www.amazon.com/Grandpas-Face-Eloise-Greenfield/dp/0698113810

https://www.amazon.com/Bringing-Rain-Kapiti-Plain-Shine/dp/0140546162

https://www.amazon.com/Tigress-Helen-Cowcher/dp/0374477817

https://www.amazon.com/Planet-Earth-Phonics-Reading-Program/dp/0545144744

2019: What we’ve read

Reading. That’s where it’s at for my daughter and I. I love it and so does she!  Here are some of the titles we really enjoyed this year. Some are from our local library and others are from our own collection.

https://www.amazon.com/Fire-Myths-Legends-Rosalind-Kerven/dp/1575720183

https://www.amazon.com/Starfish-Stars-HELLO-READER-SCIENCE/dp/0439332095

https://www.amazon.com/Just-Women-Reading-Rainbow-Books/dp/0064430561

https://www.amazon.com/I-Am-Enough-Grace-Byers/dp/0062667122

Father Why?

https://www.amazon.com/Moja-Means-One-Swahili-Counting/dp/0140546626

https://www.amazon.com/Handas-Hen-Eileen-Browne/dp/0763653616

https://www.amazon.com/Ackee-Breadfruit-Callaloo-Valerie-loom/dp/0333748875

https://www.amazon.com/Fruits-Valerie-Bloom/dp/0333653122

https://www.amazon.com/Dream-Big-Little-Vashti-Harrison/dp/0316475092

https://www.amazon.com/We-Are-Family-Patricia-Hegarty/dp/1680100548

https://www.amazon.com/Celebrating-Families-Rosmarie-Hausherr/dp/0590489372

https://www.amazon.com/Lola-at-Library-Anna-McQuinn/dp/158089142X

https://www.amazon.com/Good-Night-Sun-Hello-Moon/dp/0794403565

https://www.amazon.com/Mommy-Says-Rosheena-Beek/dp/1927750202

https://www.amazon.com/My-Grandfather-Magician-African-Village/dp/1845075102

https://www.amazon.com/Dinosaur-Time-Early-READ-Book/dp/B0056OXY1W

https://www.amazon.com/Girls-Hold-This-World-reading/dp/0439087937

https://www.amazon.com/Habits-Happy-Kids-Collection-Everything/dp/1442496177

https://www.amazon.com/Jamelas-Dress-Niki-Daly/dp/0374336679

https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Bully-Billy-Cautionary-Tales/dp/0794504655

 

Considering marriage (whatever that means for you)?

You may find these books helpful:

https://www.5lovelanguages.com/book/the-5-love-languages-singles-edition/

  couple2

How Black Women Were ‘Skimmed’ By Infant Formula Marketing

"Skimmed: Breastfeeding, Race, and Injustice" by Andrea Freeman. (Allison Hagan/Here & Now)

Here & Now‘s Tonya Mosley speaks with Andrea Freeman — whose book “Skimmed: Breastfeeding, Race, and Injustice” looks at how formula was marketed to black women in the late 20th century.

Book Excerpt: ‘Skimmed’

Introduction

A FORMULA FOR DISCRIMINATION

On May 23, 1946, in the rural southern town of Reidsville, North Carolina, a small miracle occurred. The woman responsible for this miracle was Annie Mae Fultz. Annie Mae was a tall, beautiful, Black-Cherokee mother of six children. She had lost her ability to speak and hear during a childhood illness. Beginning at 1:13 a.m., Annie Mae gave birth, in short intervals, to the world’s first recorded identical quadruplets. Against the odds, each of these four tiny girls survived their first few hours and began to grow steadily. Word of their birth spread quickly throughout the country. Annie Mae’s joy at her perfect new daughters was irrepressible, expressed in exuberant debates with friends and relatives at her hospital bedside about possible names for the girls. But this overwhelming happiness was far too short-lived.

Fred Klenner was the White doctor who delivered the girls in Annie Penn Hospital, in the basement wing reserved for Black patients. Dr. Klenner quickly realized how his new patients’ instant celebrity could benefit him. He began testing his controversial theories about vitamin C on the girls on the day of their birth, injecting them with fifty milligrams each. He did not stop there. Dr. Klenner snatched the privilege of naming the girls from Annie Mae and their father, Pete, a tenant farmer on a nearby tobacco farm. Dr. Klenner gave all the sisters the first name Mary; then middle names belonging to his wife, sister, aunt, and great-aunt: Ann, Louise, Alice, and Catherine.

Dr. Klenner was still not done. He began negotiating with formula companies that sought to become the newly famous Fultz Quads’ corporate godparent. The company with the highest bid would be the first to target Black women with a formula advertising campaign. Dr. Klenner selected St. Louis’s Pet Milk company for this honor. The deal he made with Pet Milk set in motion a chain of events that would lead to Annie Mae losing, not just the right to name her girls, but the girls themselves.

The consequences of this contract reached far beyond the Fultz sisters. Pet Milk’s campaign directed at Black women reaped unexpectedly high profits. The company was one of the first to market anything but alcohol, tobacco, or beauty products directly to Black families. Through Pet Milk’s bold marketing scheme, many Black women became convinced that formula was just as healthy as, or even healthier than, breast milk. This comforting belief made it easier for them to succumb to a host of external pressures not to breastfeed.

Over the following decades, as images marketing formula to Black women increased, positive images of Black women breastfeeding remained virtually nonexistent. Magazines such as National Geographic portrayed breastfeeding Black women as exotic and savage. Popular and media imagery reflected and perpetuated wide disparities in breastfeeding rates between Black and White mothers. Selling formula to Black women aligned with the stereotype, first popularized in slavery, of Black women as cold and incompetent mothers.

Half a century after the birth of the Fultz sisters and Pet Milk’s ad campaign, the Bad Black Mother stereotype played a role in the misfortune that befell Tabitha Walrond, a young Black woman from the Bronx, and her son, Tyler. After nineteen-year-old Tabitha became pregnant, she spent weeks struggling to break through the bureaucracy of New York’s Medicaid offices to get a card for her son before his birth. Despite her exhaustive efforts, when Tabitha went into labor, Medicaid still had not corrected the computer error that had caused the delay. The system’s indifference to the needs of a young, poor, pregnant Black woman was typical. In this case, it proved fatal.

Tabitha’s delivery was rife with complications, forcing her to extend her hospital stay by a few weeks and to delay breastfeeding. Eventually, Tabitha’s doctors released her and Tyler from the hospital. When they did, they discharged her with false information. It is common for doctors not to see Black women as individuals and to ignore symptoms that they would pay attention to in White women. Tabitha’s doctors overlooked the fact that her difficult delivery and a previous surgery would affect her milk supply. The hospital staff negligently assured Tabitha that her baby would thrive on a steady diet of her breast milk. They were wrong.

Instead, Tyler lost weight. Tabitha did not notice, because, as a new mother who never left her infant’s side, she could not easily perceive changes in his size. Although friends and family urged her to take him for a postnatal checkup, no doctor would see him without a Medicaid card. Tyler was born on August 27, 1997. He died from inadequate nutrition eight weeks later, in a taxi on the way to the emergency room. White mothers who lost children under similar circumstances received sympathy and inspired legal changes in the length of required hospital stays. In Tabitha’s case, the prosecutor charged her with second-degree manslaughter. Mourning the loss of her son, Tabitha faced the prospect of losing her freedom as well. Throughout her ordeal, the press pounced on the opportunity to demonize Tabitha and blame her for Tyler’s death.

Although separated by almost fifty years, the experiences of Annie Mae Fultz and Tabitha Walrond reveal similar truths. Cavalier attitudes toward Black mothers and children allowed a corporation to take over the Fultz sisters’ upbringing and the medical bureaucracy to fail Tyler Walrond. Dr. Klenner thought nothing of using Annie Mae Fultz’s girls for his own gain. The doctors in the Bronx neglected to see Tabitha Walrond as an individual. Multiple refusals to care for a Black newborn caught up in red tape cost him his life.

These stories are also connected by the profits that the formula industry made from them. Formula companies benefited from Annie Mae’s and Tabitha’s losses. Pet Milk made unprecedented millions from the Fultz Quads campaign. And after Tyler’s death and Tabitha’s prosecution, formula manufacturers teamed up with the CBS television network to create a cautionary episode of Chicago Hope based on the Walronds’ story. They scripted the show to scare its millions of viewers away from breastfeeding and to sell formula. The screenwriters whitewashed Tabitha, casting a White actor to play the grieving and misinformed mother. This move ensured that viewers would see breastfeeding, not bad parenting, as the cause of the infant’s death. To maximize its profits from Tabitha’s tragedy, the formula industry had first to recognize and then distract the television audience from the Bad Black Mother stereotype.

Trading on the popularity of the Fultz sisters and, later, the horror of Tyler’s death, the formula industry sold Black families lies about formula. It invited Black women to believe that their formula purchases proved they were good mothers. Modern marketing continues to associate successful Black parenting with formula use. At the same time, popular images equate ideal parenting with White breastfeeding. The message is clear: because bad Black mothers use formula, good White mothers can raise themselves above them by breastfeeding. A Black woman, like Tabitha, who pursues the breastfeeding ideal but falls short of it is a criminal. A White woman who tries but fails is a saint.

Formula is a seventy-billion-dollar industry. First designed to help infants without access to breast milk survive, formula now serves as a common replacement for human milk. The product allows many women to participate fully in the workforce, absent the structural support necessary to make both working and breastfeeding possible. Formula’s transformation from emergency supplement to common food item arose from employment demands combined with pervasive marketing touting its near equivalency to breast milk. Medical professionals’ and government programs’ promotion and purchase of formula in exchange for contributions and support from the industry also create high demand for the product.

Black mothers use formula much more than White mothers. Black women and children suffer from conditions and diseases linked to formula feeding at significantly higher rates. These disparities usually do not arise from lack of education or cultural or personal preferences about infant feeding. Instead, for the most part, they reflect the absence of choice created by government policies and unaccommodating social structures.

An Unhealthy Alliance
The federal government, through the US Department of Agriculture (USDA), is the single largest purchaser of formula in the United States. The USDA receives generous rebates on these purchases, paying only about 80 percent of the regular price of formula. The rebates go directly into the budget of the federal nutrition program for Women, Infants, and Children (WIC), allowing it to provide services to a wider cross section of communities. WIC, in turn, distributes formula free to women in its program, significantly increasing the likelihood that these women will choose not to breastfeed their children. The proportion of WIC participants who choose formula over breastfeeding is higher than in the general population. Families that have received formula free through WIC go on to purchase it later. These sales compensate for the hit the companies take from the rebates, allowing them to come out ahead even with the discounts.

The USDA also benefits from distributing free formula to poor families because most of the ingredients in formula are subsidized commodities that the agency is responsible for. Formula contains primarily corn (in the form of corn syrup) and either milk or soy. Through the Farm Bill, corn, dairy, and soy receive significant subsidies, which incentivize farmers to produce more of these foods than consumers want. The USDA, under its institutional mandate, must purchase and resell or distribute the resulting surpluses. The agency has found creative ways to do so. Its strategies include grocery store giveaways and collaborations with fast food companies to develop and promote products, such as Domino’s seven-cheese American Legends pizza, that contain obscene amounts of milk. The USDA also distributes foods made from subsidized commodities, such as chicken nuggets, cold cuts, and pizza, to low-income public school students through its National School Lunch Commodities Program.

Using its WIC and School Lunch nutritional programs to redistribute the food that consumers do not want to buy is a particularly elegant, if suspect, solution. Women and children in need of government assistance cannot afford to refuse free food, regardless of its harmful effects on their health. Exploiting this vulnerability in the context of children’s first food seems particularly egregious and has enduring consequences. The taste preferences that infants develop can last a lifetime. When high-sugar processed formula is their first food, they are likely to crave this type of food into adulthood. This diet creates a high risk of obesity, type 2 diabetes, and other preventable conditions.

Breastfeeding Facts
The health advantages of breastfeeding over formula feeding are numerous and virtually undisputed. The most esteemed global health entities, the World Health Organization and UNICEF, recommend breastfeeding for at least two years. The American Academy of Pediatrics and the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists advise breastfeeding for at least one year. The US government, through multiple agencies, including the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the Surgeon General, and the Department of Health and Human Services, urges mothers to breastfeed for as long as possible to avoid a host of harms, from ear infections to premature death. A UNICEF statement lays out exactly how high the stakes are: “Breastfeeding is the closest thing the world has to a magic bullet for child survival.” Globally, multiple studies link low breastfeeding rates to high infant mortality. Of the twenty-six largest industrialized and twenty wealthiest nations, the United States has the highest rate of infant mortality. This rate is twice as high for Black infants as for White ones.

The factors that contribute to Black women’s low breastfeeding rates are manifold, complex, and interconnected. They include race-targeted marketing, unequal distribution of resources for new mothers, and historical and present discrimination. Underlying these factors is the symbiotic relationship between the US government and formula corporations that gives the government a stake in the formula industry. This partnership harms women and infants in all communities but has a disproportionately negative impact on Black women and children.

Black women are overrepresented in the government assistance programs that distribute free formula. Too often, Black women live in “first food” deserts, a term for neighborhoods bereft of government services for new mothers. The hospitals in their communities dispense more free formula than hospitals in White neighborhoods do and discharge new mothers before they can receive guidance and support for nursing their newborns. Laws designed to protect breastfeeding mothers at work do not apply to part-time jobs or the small businesses that employ many Black women. Under 1996 welfare-to-work reform, many Black women, who make up a disproportionate number of welfare recipients, must return to work before their infants are ready to stop nursing, under conditions that make breastfeeding impossible.

Long-standing false narratives about Black mothers obscure the structural causes of their low breastfeeding rates. Collective belief in the existence of the Bad Black Mother leads to low or no investment in resources for breastfeeding Black mothers. It also underlies health care professionals’ assumptions that Black women do not require nursing support or education. The Bad Black Mother stereotype has its roots in slavery.

Teach them while they’re young

Ideally our children need to be taught how to handle finances from young. Do your abundance affirmations with them. Create your own new moon/first moon rituals. Get your thoughts around prosperity in order. These are all key! Simultaneously our children need to know about far more in order to be successful.  Think: Intergenerational wealth. Saving, investing, banking, entrepreneurship and more.  These tools can help:

https://theblackbusinessschool.com/courses/category/Children

https://www.amazon.com/Danny-Dollar-Millionaire-Extraordinaire-Lemonade/dp/0615395171

28 Children’s Books About Money

8 of the Best Books for Kid and Teen Entrepreneurs

10 Books for Budding Entrepreneurs and Can-Do Kids

https://www.amazon.com/How-Become-Successful-Young-Man/dp/0692244360

https://www.amazon.com/How-Become-Successful-Young-Workbook/dp/B01FKUJYM4

https://www.amazon.com/How-Become-Successful-Young-Woman/dp/1945318015

https://www.amazon.com/How-Become-Successful-Young-Woman/dp/1945318023

 

Keeping your holidays truly green

Regardless of whether you’re into “the holidays” or not the following article offers fabulous advice. Take heed. Enjoy the family time!

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4 Gifts for Christmas: How to Make Your Family Happy With Less

Inside: Recapture the magic of the holidays by giving just 4 gifts for Christmas! Here are the “gotchas” to avoid plus the best “want need wear read” gift ideas.

One Christmas when my oldest was a preschooler, something shifted compared to previous holiday seasons. Instead of getting a couple cute onesies and board books as gifts from loved ones, she got piles and piles of presents.

Grandparents on both sides sent gifts. Extended relatives. Family friends.

Not to mention the gifts we’d gotten her ourselves.

That Christmas morning, it took forever for Abby to get through opening all the toys and gadgets and gifts. Then about five presents in, the light went out in her eyes.

She would carefully undo the tape on the wrapping, open the box, pull out the gift, and set it on the teetering stack next to her. Then she’d look up with a small smile, say “thank you,” and move onto the next gift.

She could no longer get excited because she was absolutely overwhelmed.

Bonus: As a bonus for joining my weekly newsletter, download a special 4-gift wish list FREE printable for your child.

Without the 4-gift rule, your kids are just plain overwhelmed

We Had to Make a Change

That night lying next to each other in bed, my husband and I talked about how Abby became almost robot-like when she hit that point of overwhelm.

That’s not what we wanted our holiday season to be about – overloading our child with gifts until she has to shut down just to cope with the excess of stuff. Plus, we wanted to try to have another baby one day, so we knew that sort of gift-giving free-for-all wouldn’t be sustainable as our family grew.

That night, I Googled “how to keep Christmas from getting out of control” and stumbled on the tradition of giving 4 gifts for Christmas – a simple guideline that’s supposed to help you keep the holiday season focused on what really matters. With the 4-gift rule, each person gets just four gifts for Christmas:

  1. Something you want,
  2. Something you need,
  3. Something to wear, and
  4. Something to read.

Not just a catchy little rhyme, the 4-gift rule for Christmas promises to help keep your holiday season from devolving into a materialistic frenzy of more, more, more and helps you stick to a reasonable budget.

But more important than that, many parents report that giving just four gifts for Christmas can help you raise kids who appreciate what they have instead of following in Dudley Dursley’s footsteps and throwing a temper tantrum when they end up with 36 presents instead of last year’s 37.

This Is What Giving 4 Gifts for Christmas Really Looks Like

We were excited to start the “want need wear read” tradition, but we had to wait a whole year. Starting in July, we were already thinking ahead to what special gifts would make the cut with the 4-gift rule.

But by the time November hit, I started feeling a little panicky. By shifting so abruptly from the excessive haul of gifts last year to just 4 things for Christmas this year, would we ruin the magic of Christmas for Abby?

My husband and I were relieved to have the 4-gift rule to rein ourselves in when it came to buying gifts for each other because we tended to go overboard with each other, too. But we couldn’t shake our worries about what the 4-present rule would do to our daughter’s experience on Christmas morning.

After lots of debate and second-guessing ourselves, this is what we ultimately decided on for her 4 gifts for Christmas that year:

  • What Abby wanted most of all was an American Girl doll, so that was her “something you want.”
  • A big package of colorful socks for her growing little feet was her “something you need.”
  • For “something to wear,” a pretty new dress.
  • And for “something to read,” a set of classic Beverly Cleary paperbacks.

We didn’t completely get the grandparents and extended family bought into the 4-present tradition, but they did tone it way down compared to the previous year. Their gifts tended to be mostly books and clothes instead of plastic toys that would end up collecting dust on a shelf within a week.

So…Did We Ruin Christmas Morning?

That was Abby’s last Christmas as an only child, and the three of us stayed in our jammies that morning while opening presents. Her pile of presents was easily a fourth of the size of the previous year’s massive pile.

My husband and I sat on the floor next to her, sipping our coffee. Because we didn’t have a huge stack of presents to get through ourselves, we could afford to pause with her after each gift to appreciate what it was and who it came from.

And the light never went out of her eyes.

She didn’t hit that point of overwhelm. She didn’t turn into a robot going through the motions of opening presents. She stayed in the moment with us, enjoying the delight of a few thoughtful surprises.

Ever since that holiday season, we’ve stuck with the 4-gift rule, and it’s been a game-changer for taming the excess of the holiday season.

We especially love how the “want need wear read” tradition brings a sense of intention to our gift-giving. Because when you’re giving just 4 gifts for Christmas, they end up being incredibly thoughtful gifts – not random gadgets or trinkets you get just to get something, even though you know they’ll soon end up shoved in a closet or somewhere else out of sight, forgotten and collecting dust.

All this to say: Our new tradition of giving each other just 4 gifts for Christmas didn’t ruin our Christmas. It saved our Christmas.

But What About…?

As with any family tradition, you’ll have to make the 4-gift rule your own so it feels right to you and your family. But here are some common “gotchas” with shifting to giving 4 gifts for Christmas and suggestions for how you can avoid them.

To be clear, I’m certainly not the be-all-end-all expert on this topic. But I have picked the brains of every family I know who’s started giving just 4 gifts for Christmas. Below, you’ll find the culmination of tips and tricks from many, many families who’ve adopted the 4-gift rule. For example:

  • Do you follow the 4-gift rule for stockings, too?
  • How do you handle it when your kids expect more than 4 gifts for Christmas?
  • What about gifts from siblings to one another?
  • How can you get grandparents and extended family on board with limiting gifts?
  • How do you handle Santa gifts?

After that, you’ll find a list of the best “want need wear read” gift ideas. Enjoy!

Do you follow the 4-gift rule for stockings, too?

Just like with too many gifts under the tree, an overflowing stocking can be overwhelming for kids, too. Instead of filling your kids’ stockings with small plasticky junk that will end up broken or lost within a few days, consider going for quality over quantity.

A few ideas for how to get a fun (but less overwhelming) mix of stocking stuffers:

  • Replace several “stuff” gifts with one or two of these small but meaningful giftsthat make the perfect stocking stuffers for kids.
  • Make a special treat, like your child’s favorite kind of cookie or a chocolate goody. Or if you’re not great in the kitchen, pick up a special ready-made treat like a chocolate bar from the fancy chocolate section of the grocery store. One high-quality treat can teach little ones to savor what they have instead of a whole bag of junky treats that they inhale without really appreciating.
  • Add a card game that will be fun for the whole family to play. You can check my list of the best board games and card games for all ages for ideas, but to save you time I’ll list our favorite card games here real quick: Sleeping QueensSushi Go!SwishUnoCreate and Tell Me A Story, and Spot It!.

How do you handle it when your kids expect more than 4 gifts for Christmas?

If your kids are young, they likely won’t even notice the shift to 4 gifts for Christmas. Our daughter was almost five when we made the change, and she didn’t think anything of it.

Some kids end up loving the smallest, least expensive gift most of all anyway. Not to mention that toddlers and preschoolers tend to be happiest playing with the cardboard boxes the gifts came in!

But if your kids are older and tend to be concerned with how many gifts they get each year, you may want to get them on board upfront to head off any hint of disappointment on Christmas morning. If your kids are old enough to remember how many gifts they got last year and to expect the same or more this year, they’re old enough for a frank discussion about gift giving and what’s most important during the holiday season.

You can do this in a few different ways, depending on what will resonate best with your kiddos:

  • Reminisce together – One night at dinner, start a conversation about gifts and the ones that stick with you. For example, you can try asking, “What’s your favorite gift you’ve ever received? Something you still remember, even if it was a while ago?” Go ahead and share your answer, too. You may find that everyone’s favorite gifts were the kind that give you treasured memories, not gifts that come from a store. That can open the door to a discussion about how you can give each other that kind of gift this holiday season instead of just a bunch of stuff that will be forgotten.
  • Give them a higher purpose – As a family, read a children’s book about how some people may not have all the same things your family has. One picture book that made a huge impact on my kids was A Chair for My Mother. In my preschooler’s words: “I liked it when the whole town helped the family.” For tweens and teens, you can watch a documentary with them like Living On One Dollar. Then you can start a discussion about how some others may not have enough food for their families, or a home to keep them warm, or shoes that fit their feet. You might try asking your kids something like, “This Christmas, how could we help people who need food and clothes?” If they don’t take the bait, you can go ahead and plant the seed: “Could we save some money that we usually spend on gifts for ourselves to help others who need it more than we do?”
  • Be upfront – If what led you to the 4-gift rule is the promise of keeping your holiday budget under control, go ahead and let your kids know. It’s good for kids to understand that adults have to make choices about how to spend money, and they’re not always easy choices – because they’ll have to make those choices one day, too. Just be careful not to stress your kids out with adult-level money concerns. For example, you might say, “Typically, we spend a lot of money on Christmas gifts, but that means when we want or need something next year, we may not have the money for it. So this year, we’re going to focus on giving a few awesome gifts instead of lots of just okay gifts.” If your kids aren’t familiar with the phrase “quality over quantity” yet, now would be a good time to introduce that concept.

You can also share a want need wear read Christmas list printable with your kids instead of asking them to write a typical free-for-all wish list. At the end of this post, you can download a free want need wear read Christmas printable that you can print and share with your kids.

What about gifts from siblings to one another?

Encouraging siblings to think of others is a good thing, but giving one gift to each other should be plenty to help kids learn the art of gift giving. Our favorite way to get our kids excited about giving gifts to each other is the Sibling Super Secret Spy Shopping Trip.

Still, if you have more than two kids, every kid getting a gift for every sibling can quickly add up. In that case, you can have the kids draw names from a hat, Secret Santa style.

How can you get grandparents and extended family on board with limiting gifts?

This is a common issue for many families, so I put together a list of all the best ideas for how to politely request no Christmas gifts or fewer gifts. Because we all know simply saying “no Christmas gifts please” won’t cut it.

How do you handle Santa gifts?

Full disclosure: In my family, we don’t do Santa gifts. But here are a few ideas I heard from other families who do incorporate Santa into their holiday traditions:

  • Follow the 4-gift rule for gifts from you to your kids, then give one special “Santa gift.” If your kids are used to more gifts than that, you can explain that Santa’s sleigh is only so big, and he has millions of children to visit every Christmas Eve, so he can fit only one gift per child. Watching a movie like The Polar Express can help reinforce this “one gift from Santa” message.
  • Explain that every year, more and more kids are being born, and Santa is having trouble fitting bigger gifts in his sleigh. This year, he’s switching to filling stockings instead of leaving gifts under the tree.
  • Make Santa’s gift an experience gift for the whole family. For example, Santa could gift your whole family a movie night in a box, a monthly subscription box, or everything you need for a family camping trip including s’mores fixin’s (even if it’s just in your own backyard or living room!). Our favorite subscription box for kids is from Kiwi Crates. These monthly hands-on projects are perfect for curious kids, kids who love science, creative kids, kids who love to tinker, and more…in other words, every kid. We received this as a gift last year, and my kids run to the mailbox on the day it’s due to arrive every month. To get $10 off your first Kiwi Crate subscription box, click here and use the coupon code SHARE10.

24 “Want Need Wear Read” Gift Ideas for Kids

The first year we sat down to figure out 4 gifts for Christmas for everyone in our immediate family, we drew a blank on a couple of the categories.

In a free-for-all gift giving situation, it doesn’t matter if some gifts are duds because you have tons of other gifts to pick up the slack. But when you start the 4-gift tradition with your family, you may find yourself wanting to make sure each gift is stellar. If your child is getting just 4 gifts for Christmas, there’s no room for duds.

Because it can be a little more challenging to find the perfect gift to fit into each “want need wear read” category, here are a few “want need wear read” gift ideas for you.

Something You Want

For “something you want,” it’s your chance to give your child the one thing you know will make their little face light up. This may be the easiest category to tackle because a lot of kids have one wish list item they’ve been talking about for weeks (or months), whether that’s a toy, electronics, or a brand new art set to replace a hodge-podge mess of broken crayons and dried-out markers.

On the other hand, some kids – especially younger kids – may change what’s at the top of their wish list on a daily basis. In that situation, you know your child best and what will delight her. In our family, we try to go with a gift idea our preschooler has mentioned a few times rather than a gift idea she first heard about the week before Christmas.

But if your child doesn’t have a clear “want,” check out this huge list of The Most Meaningful Gifts for Kids Who Have Everything. To save you some time, here are the top 3 most popular gift ideas from that list:

  • Make a date once a month. Most kids want nothing more than one-on-one time with the important people in their lives, so gift them a year of monthly “dates”of special one-on-one time with you.How to Wrap It: Grab 12 colorful envelopes like these, label them with the months, and insert a card or brochure about each special day. Activities could include going out for ice cream, bowling, seeing a movie together, or anything else the child would enjoy doing with you. For more ideas, check out this mom’s story of how she put this gift together.
  • Take them somewhere super fun. Get tickets to your child’s favorite local amusement park, theme park, or water park – or make plans for some other extra special outing like a bouncy house center, indoor rock climbing gym, trampoline park, bowling alley, miniature golf course, skating rink, or any other place they’d love to go. Your child will get the gift of an awesome day when you take them on this special outing, plus they’ll build memories that will stick with them for a long time.How to Wrap It: Print a photo of where you’re taking them (or a promotional flyer would work too) and wrap that.
  • Send a monthly box of fun. You can find a monthly subscription box for just about anything nowadays, from art projects to science experiments. And even though you’re technically gifting a subscription box to the kids, parents benefit too because you’re helping keep the kids busy with a new project once a month! Our favorite subscription box ever is from Kiwi Crates because the fun hands-on projects in their boxes are custom tailored to every age from newborns (yes, really!) to teenagers and everything in between. We received this as a gift last year, and my kids run to the mailbox on the day it’s due to arrive every month. For more subscription box ideas, check out The Most Meaningful Gifts for Kids Who Have Everything.How to Wrap It: Typically, you can pick the date of the first box delivery and add a special note from you to the recipient inside the box to let them know to expect a new box every month.
To get $10 off your first Kiwi Crate subscription box, click here and use the coupon code SHARE10

Something You Need

If your family is blessed to be able to provide for your children’s needs when they crop up instead of waiting for birthdays and holidays, this category may be a challenge.

Here are a few ideas of things kids tend to need:

  • Shoes to replace ones that are worn out or too small
  • sturdy backpack to replace one that’s falling apart
  • If they play sports: sports equipment or gear like a new soccer ball, volleyball, and so on
  • bike helmet if they’ve outgrown their current helmet (same goes for knee and elbow pads)
  • A winter coat
  • A sleeping bag if they’ve outgrown the one they have
  • Underwear, socks, and/or belts (by the way, Solmate Socks are my kids’ favorite because you can wear them mismatched!)
  • A lunch box and/or reusable water bottle (we love the Klean Kanteen water bottles for kids because they’re all stainless steel and super durable)
  • Pajamas
  • An annual planner or calendar to keep track of school deadlines and extracurricular commitments

Something to Wear

The obvious choice here is clothing, but here are a few creative gifts that also work in this category:

Something to Read

For kids who enjoy reading, this category is a no-brainer. The hard part may be picking just one book to gift!

Because my oldest tends to devour fiction quickly and doesn’t re-read it unless it’s an all-time favorite like Harry Potter, I try to gift books she’ll enjoy coming back to again and again, like how-to guides or project-based books. (This year, I’m considering getting her a copy of Quiet Power: The Secret Strengths of Introverted Kids, which she checked out from the library and loved.)

For my preschooler and toddler, I pay attention to which picture books we’ve checked out from the library and they ask to read again and again, then I’ll get them a copy of their very own so we can read that favorite to them anytime they want.

But if you have a child who doesn’t enjoy reading, don’t despair because here are a few creative ideas for the “something to read” category:

  • Subscribe to a fun magazine. Kids love getting mail addressed just to them, and they’ll be building their reading skills without even realizing it. Plus, most kids’ magazines include activity and craft ideas for kids. And after the kids are done reading, they can pass the magazine along to a friend. A few ideas for you: HighlightsRanger Rick Jr, or anything in the Cricket magazine family like Ladybug for 3- to 6-year-olds, Cricket for 9- to 14-year-olds, and more.
  • Share your childhood favorite. What was your favorite book as a child? Get a copy to share with the child, and write a special note on the inside cover about why it’s your favorite. That personal touch may be just the nudge they need to give it a go.
Tg through each category, but your child can also fill it out independently and give it to you when she’s done.

Here’s a sneak peek of your 4-gift rule wish list: